Tuesday, 21 August 2007

How Win Friends and Influence People

A very quick review. Dale Carnegie first wrote this book back in 1936, since that time a few revisions have been published and the editors of these books have worked to modernise the stories/case studies on a regular basis. For example the copy I have was last printed in 1999 in the Harper Business Classics series.

Now I have read this book cover to cover, and I can confirm it has some tremendous points in the book. Just that reading the book really did feel like reading one of the classics. It was a bit tortuous at times and as you can imagine written in 1936, it has a very "Gentlemanly" tone to it.

I can recommend buying this book - it is quite an asset to have on your bookshelf. For now though I've included a summary of the principles from each chapter below. Simply considering these principles at face value provides some benefit. Be aware though - putting them to practice is much harder.

Note this summary comes from a Dale Carnegie Page at:


Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
  1. Don't criticize, condemn or complain.
  2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
  3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.
Six ways to make people like you
  1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
  2. Smile.
  3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
  4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  5. Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
  6. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.
Win people to your way of thinking
  1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
  2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say, "You're wrong."
  3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
  4. Begin in a friendly way.
  5. Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
  6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
  7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
  8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
  9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
  10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
  11. Dramatize your ideas.
  12. Throw down a challenge.
Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
A leader's job often includes changing your people's attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:
  1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
  2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
  3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
  5. Let the other person save face.
  6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise."
  7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
  9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.


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